This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
