Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
