I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Randomize
