I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
