Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
