we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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