bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
