she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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