Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
