i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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