i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
