I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
