i just google imaged poop.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
