I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
