i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
