Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
