Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
