if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
