I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize