You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
