Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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