I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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