what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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