he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
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