Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
