it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
