there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
