I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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