okay pat passed out under dana's car
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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