i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
