one two three fourrrrnication!
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
