when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
