i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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