Taylor Swift is so right about you.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
