I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
