IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
