6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
