we're blogging at a bar
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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