Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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