i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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