My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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