I forgot how hot balto sounded
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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