I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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