all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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