i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
