I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
