Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
i need some magic done to my vagina
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize