guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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