i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
