Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
