walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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