So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
