I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Randomize
